Arranged marrage, and Russian mail-order brides

I can’t think of anything worse than spending your life with someone that you didn’t choose to merry. You would be forced to have a relationship with that person, and if you began to have true feelings for some one else, you would have to hide those feelings or your life would be at risk.

When I hear forced marriage, think of old medieval kings and queens and how people married into royalty way back then. Even though I know that it is still going on, I didn’t really think about it until I read this blog assignment.

When it comes down to it, if you life is at risk in this situation, I can see why you would choose arranged marriage. I can’t relate to this type of situation because I grew up in the great U.S of A, wear people have endless opportunities and choices. I also find it ironic that the divorce rate in the U.S. is the highest in the world.

Oh yeah and what about Russian mail-order brides? Do they really need to get out of Russia that bad? I think it’s funny that some of them are educated people that make a living in, but still would marry who ever just to move to the U.S

Non romantic marriages

People in traditional communities in countries where the state is either weak or absent depend on relatives to help meet the basic challenges of survival. Without the state to provide people with fundamental services such as clean water and sanitation facilities. Also, without the state providing certain social securities for the unemployed or disabled, citizens must rely on their social networking in order to survive. Without this intricate set of social networks, people would not have any sort of assistance when they are in desperate need. Therefore, social networks comprised of family and friends provide a very important safety net for billions of people in the developing nations of the world. In such societies, it may be risky for people to choose marriage partners exclusively based on romantic love. Due to the conditions described above, one in economic deprivation must consider the wealth of their future spouse, or the social networks that said spouse would provide for the family. Both economic status and potential social networks must be taken into consideration when one is searching for a marital partner. Choosing a partner based on romantic love alone could have economic repercussions or possible rewards, but the economic capabilities of that partner should be taken into serious consideration before marriage. Other factors that may contribute to the overall economic and social growth of a community include the education of the young citizens, the health care system of this community, and job-training facilities or programs. Both education and job-training programs will provide citizens with the knowledge and skills necessary to become a productive and well-paid member of society. Providing young individuals with nutritious food and health care facilities will ensure that they will be healthy enough to complete their education and/or job training, making the society more economically stable.

Marriage

In the society we live in most couples do not marry if a child is conceived. I dont see this as a problem because women are more than able to support themselves and a child in todays society. If the couple wants to get married because possible emotional damage to the child of not having a mother and a father in the home go ahead. In cultures where male presence is needed for the survival of the family without there being "love" its just survival theres nothing wrong with that. In societies were the marriage is chosen by the elders in the family the couple sometimes grow closer to one another after having children; initially getting married if they weren't in "love." The idea of love and survival are very different among societies. I think that if our society needed to change to a survival view of the way we go about reproducing our society would fall.

"All You Need Is Love" ?

As much as I would like to believe The Beatles that, “all you need is love”, I think it’s very risky to choose a marriage partner exclusively based on romantic love in countries where the state is weak or absent. I know somebody who just found out that they have some serious health problems, but they do not have any health insurance. As a result of this, they are unable to receive the proper medical treatment. That’s an awful situation to be in, and if it came down to it I would think there best bet would be to marry someone with health insurance that they could benefit from. You can’t survive on just love alone. So for people in countries or situations where they could greatly benefit from marrying someone whom they did not love, but could take care of them….then that is what they should do. You have to look out for your physical wellbeing first and foremost. And if you are lucky enough to find someone that you love who can also take care of you, then in the words of Michael Bluth, “Well, yeah you've gotta lock that down.”

Individuals and Western Culture

I find there is a relationship between those two factors. Western culture is a very individual driven culture. We tend to be more independent and not rely on society as much as people in other societies. They depend on other people to provide the essentials for living, such as food and shelter. In our western culture, we rely on our parents for such things when we are younger. However, as we grow our reliance on them becomes less. 

Because of this we can choose to go against the established traditions. Such as, getting married right away, having children. We do not fear shunning of our culture for doing these things. While in other societies you could become an out cast for not subscribing to these traditions and possibly not be able to care for yourself.

"I do"/"I Don't"

In countries such as the United States and Europe it is becoming increasingly common to have children outside of wedlock. It no longer seems necessary to marry if a pregnancy occurs. This stand off approach to marriage could be linked to the increase in divorce rates; people are getting married at an older age than people did only a few generations ago. Typically, when two people were married that is when they would begin to live together and support themselves. In today’s society people live with their significant others without having to get married, and in many cases support each other even if they are not legally together.
Now even if marriage is happening at a later age, childbirth is still likely to take place around the same age due to the “biological clock” or, frankly, from accidents as our society is also increasingly promiscuous. These accidental pregnancies and planned unwed conceptions could lead to marriage for more traditional couples, but it doesn’t seem necessary anymore as women are now in the work force and in many cases support themselves for many years without the help of a husband.
In other cultures however where survival is more difficult than waking up at six am everyday, unmarried child rearing could be most difficult. If the “tribe” does not collectively help to raise children, then women may have a difficult time gathering, or planting enough food for herself and her children. Even in the US such legal arrangements exist like child support, where if the father is not wedded to the mother he is still obligated to help fund the raising of his child. If a man deserts a woman in a culture that cannot bind him to his new “family”, then the abandoned mother and child could suffer from a lack of support that would be offered in traditional marriages.
This being said, I think it is a cultural reflection to forgo marriage in some cases. In such cultures as our own, where women hold their own jobs and households, it may not seem as urgent a situation to marry. While a women being supported by her family in a culture where marriage and childbirth depend of the survival of the people, marriage would be a likely very urgent for the sack of procreation.